When reflecting myself on the mirror, I was never thought that I'd be a mother by now. In my previous life, I was a free spirit with invisible wings attached on my back, flew whenever my heart desire to, fly far away from one clouds to another without boundaries. Nothing could stop me or frighten me. To be honest, I was never imagining to have a child on my twenties or thirties or maybe forever life holds me...
But here I am now, standing in front of the mirror, carrying my daughter, laughing at our own reflections. And I was thinking of how thankful I am to have her in my life now.
It is hard at the first time to put away my 'free spirit' minded and to locked it secretly in one corner of my heart, and woke up every mornings knowing that there is a human being helplessly attached to me, but God is Almighty, "have faith in yourself and you'll manage".
Being a mother; so many things I have to learn, so many things I want to share...but how! I am a full time mother, away from my family and friends, I'm on my own adventure with this new little family of mine. Restless, helpless, clueless... The internet is the only way I could escape and being me for awhile and connect to the world I left behind for now... One day I was googling, googling, browsing and browsing to find if there's 'another me as a mommy' out there. And there is this The Urban Mama website! It took sometimes for me to recognise that it is what I need to watch and learn, to share and help. I find it helpful, inspiring and entertaining to read The Urban Mama's, it makes me understand that I'm not alone, that every gifted woman (we are 'the gifted' ones for being a mother) is one-click away from me (and all of us) to help and share our amazing moments of parenting in general and being mother especially. The Urban Mama's has boosted up my self-confidences of being a mother and still being me at the same time. It's about our decision to be or not to be 'The Urban Mama'! And I've choose to be 'The Urban Mama'.
My intention has always been true to my path. I've opened my heart and release my 'free spirit' from the secret corner in my heart now, I've learnt that my commitment of being a mother and a wife with that 'free spirit' of mine could go along just fine.
As a person, my biggest sense of achievement--and what I am most proud of--is being a mother of a wonderful daughter, my Ssynabia Sophia Adeputri.
